If you’re in Gryffindor
For some Gryffindors, being brave and daring and chivalrous came with a hefty side-order of recklessness (see: Harry’s habit of charging off to save people at the drop of a hat), impulsive thoughtlessness (see: Ron deserting his friends during the Horcrux hunt), and even arrogance (cough Sirius and James cough). Perhaps you, too, are a Gryffindor occasionally prone to be quick-tempered or over-confident? We’re not judging, honestly – even the Chosen One wasn’t perfect.
So if this does sound like you, we suggest that this year, you resolve to think before you act. You know, like Harry was once forced to by Hermione, when she insisted he check Sirius was actually being held at the Department of Mysteries before running full-pelt into danger. Alright, they did then end up running full-pelt into danger, but at least Hermione’s voice of reason prevailed for a minute or two. And it never hurts to consider the consequences before jumping right in.
If you’re in Hufflepuff
We have long taken issue with Hagrid’s casual reference to Hufflepuffs being ‘a lot o’ duffers,’ but this New Year we urge any Hufflepuffs for whom this entirely unfounded assumption still rankles to join us as we say: ignore the haters.
Yes, from this moment on, we resolve to stop caring what other people think – unless they’re thinking good things, in which case they are correct and we need talk no more about it. Because Hufflepuff is a house of bright, kind, emotionally intelligent people. And emotionally intelligent people do not dwell on nonsense spouted by those who are less well-informed. Hufflepuffs, let’s make 2023 the year we rise above it.
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If you’re in Ravenclaw
Every Ravenclaw understands that being known for wit, creativity and/or cleverness can sometimes be exhausting; even a bit daunting. Occasionally, a Ravenclaw just wants to enter the room without having to first ponder an obscure question, meditate on the meaning of life, or complete some tricky logic puzzle. Do you know what we mean? What we are saying is that nobody can be witty or creative or clever all of the time. No, not even you, young Ravenclaw.
And so we are giving you permission to relax. Yes, Ravenclaws, that’s all you have to do this New Year. Resolve to chill out. Take some time off. Get the answer to that logic puzzle wrong or something. It’ll be good for you. Trust us. We’re off for a lie-down.
If you’re in Slytherin
We know Slytherins get a bad rap for that cunning ambition they supposedly possess, but as we’ve said before, it’s not always a bad thing. On the contrary, it’s good to have goals and to be confident about achieving them. That’s basically what a New Year’s resolution is, right?
All of which is to say: Slytherins, please don’t take this the wrong way, but this New Year we’d like you to consider the old saying – pride comes before a fall. Take Draco Malfoy. His misplaced family pride certainly led him to extreme lengths. So if, like Draco, your Slytherin ambition has ever threatened to overshadow your other instincts, we suggest you keep that in mind this January. Resolve to swallow your pride when circumstances require it – and to ask for help if you need it. Then we’ll be the proud ones.
